This is so wrong ,just wrong but it felt right…it felt so damn good, too good to walk away from Just too good to be true. He knew exactly what to say, when to say and how to say it; he wasn’t one for so many words but he was smooth.
He wasn’t one for flattery, "being objective can save you a lot of stress" he would say. He knew where and what to touch, grab and hold. How can one man possess all these???. This was a sign, a clear sign; I did not miss it.
This was a bad omen. "What am I doing here"? It was my second visit and my zipper was flying south; he had reminded me of the things I have been missing out from, how good it felt to be an avatar flying in another beautiful planet full of stars and diamonds.
The feeling was awesome, he was so damn good!. "Am I supposed to be doing this now"? "why am I doing this"? "how was he so good"? "do I even know him enough"?. He had told me there was only one he had loved all his life, with one or two others afterwards.
He wasn’t really bent on talking about them. so many questions ran through my mind, but we had talked almost about everything…on the phone?...now it didn’t feel right anymore. A couple of times friends have jokingly told me how I was single because I was too smart.
I don’t take myself to be that smart, in fact I try to learn something new every day not to feel left out amongst my circle of friends. Was I being smart now or just plain stupid!?. I knew it was time to stop this fantasy and run, the little girl inside me was already tired of screaming "run". I knew I did not believe some things he had said.
I was too shy to ask and too scared to loose. "Maggie just keep an open mind for once" he said. Dave one of those friends that think I intentionally make myself too much work for men. Fear sometimes is overrated but it looks to be the best strategy for safety.
I was distracted, drifting into my subconscious when I felt it; like a skilled pianist he knew exactly how to use his fingers, he increased the tempo and slowly came down as he continued like he had been practicing with a Spanish guitar.
I was floating…then he grabbed my face, looked deep into my eyes and said "we are in this together, am no expert at this, just follow my lead and let`s build our own thing". And as I opened my mouth…he closed it once again…

Wow. Very nice post... Please keep sharing.
ReplyDelete